Have you ever had a conflict with someone?
I have more than once. And I bet the way I solved it is different from how many of you would approach it.
Conflicts are part of life. And the interesting thing is: the closer someone is to us, the more potential there is for conflict in that relationship.
Psychologically, conflicts occur more often between close relationships, precisely because the bond is so strong. We dare to show more, expect more and let our emotions out more freely.
But how conflicts are expressed varies greatly across cultures:
In collectivist cultures (e.g. many Asian, African, Latin American contexts), closeness is lived as loyalty. Conflicts are often handled indirectly, through silence, withdrawal, or mediation to preserve harmony.
In individualist cultures (e.g. Germany, the US, Northern Europe), direct confrontation is seen as normal. Autonomy and clarity are highly valued, and conflict can even be understood as a necessary step toward independence.
That’s also how I see it: I want to address it, speak directly and resolve it without circling around. That’s how I was socialized.
And in the workplace?
This is where both logics collide.
– Some experience colleagues as too confrontational.
– Others perceive restraint as inauthentic or conflict-averse.
That’s why many frictions in international teams don’t arise because people “don’t understand each other” but because closeness and loyalty are lived differently.
Perhaps the real skill is this: not only solving conflicts, but translating them.
Translating Conflict
